episode 045 | friendly neighbourhood super hero 03

this transcript was generously provided by ilias with minor formatting changes from me

INTRO

SATAH: Welcome to Folio, an actual play podcast about solo and epistolary TTRPGs. I’m your host, Satah, and I’m showcasing multiple possible experiences of self-paced games by inviting guests to play them alongside me so I can compile our stories together. You can support the show financially at patreon.com/foliopod or with a one-off donation at ko-fi.com/foliopod.

One last reminder that this show is going to be removed from Spotify distribution around the end of August. This will likely be last episode on the Spotify feed, so you can keep up with the show through another podcatcher. Thanks!

This is episode three of our games of Friendly Neighborhood Superhero, a solo rpg about protecting, befriending, and improving a community by Catscratcher Studio. The other two cordial stomping-ground saviors joining me today are Gwen Frankenstein and Jeff Stormer.

GAME: DAY TWO

JEFF: Alright.

GWEN: Alright, rise and shine!

JEFF: Here we go.

JEFF and SATAH: Day two.

JEFF: Starting it the exact same way and gonna roll a d6, get a snapshot of Kelvin’s day to day life. In this case it is three. It is on his day job. What is Kelvin doing in his day job? I mention a lot of like odd job stuff but I think that’s just sort of his like off hours. I think he works at the docks. That feels good; that feels like logical. He’s a dockworker. That’s a good working class city job.

SATAH: How did the day start? “I was on my day job when suddenly…” Yeah that makes sense. So I’m back at the cafe and was it a crime or a neighbor needing help? Rolled a one, so it’s a crime! I’m gonna start my day off with crime.

GWEN: Good morning Golden Pastures! Today we are solving a crime first thing in the am.

SATAH: That’s- who is this? This is a bloodthirsty mercenary who’s trying to build a doom device through… ninja masters? [Rerolls] Laser traps.

GWEN: A time traveling warlord who is trying to rob a science facility with an army of robots. So that makes me think that this person is time displaced from the future. Yeah? Yeah. Oh- oh what if they’re- ooh, I think they’re- they’re- they’re trying to rob the science facility to steal the technology that allows them to time travel. Oh ho.

JEFF: So he is you know unloading a like a cargo ship when something happens. That is another six so that is another neighbor in need. In this case our neighbor in need is… I’m gonna do my thing where I roll three d20 and kind of like assign results because I think that’s a little bit more my speed. Here we have a twenty, a three, and a sixteen.

So this is a protective entrepreneur building a project. Okay see now that’s very interesting. Those- I just kind of read those straight, I didn’t do any rearranging and that’s very interesting ‘cuz that means we get to introduce a shady CEO. I’m gonna roll a d6 here. Four. They’re an adult so this is like a CEO of like a shady corporation that is like launching a project. And I think like this is this is specifically day job work in service of- you know what were wearing a references on our sleeves here. This is gon’ be- this is the- this is the Cronenberg Foundation which is like a large organization within this- within Bell City. The Cronenberg Foundation is like launching a project and they are unloading like high-tech security equipment. Or like computers and things are being loaded off a cargo hold. There’s a lot of like manual lifting of heavy boxes and things and I think that’s exactly where we are starting.

SATAH: A bloodthirsty mercenary is trying to build a doom device with laser traps. Okay. I think this is somebody who is- this- this involves the telescope. I think the mercenary isn’t trying to literally specifically build the doom device, they are trying to take over the telescope so that it can be turned into a doom device. They’ve- they’ve been hired to like do that, to do the-the muscle-y, bloody parts. So I’m at the cafe and somebody ordered a coffee to stay and then they check their phone and they go “Hm. Can we get that to go actually? Looks like there’s an incident at the telescope.” And they’re weirdly chill about it but I know that they like are a high ranking person and so if they’re being called and it’s a big deal. And so I give them their coffee to go; I run into the back; I tell my boss that I’m gonna go- I’m going to go to the store to pick up more oat milk and she’s like “okay, no problem.” She’s chill as hell. She rules. Um, change into my costume and dart around to meet the person who got their coffee to go to be like “hey, I heard there was trouble. Can I get a ride?” And they’re like “ah yeah sure actually yeah, yeah that’s not a bad idea.” And we walk to their car and get in their car and go the telescope. To quite a scene. So this this mercenary has taken over this whole telescope and there’s lasers.

GWEN: Alright so we are outside Golden Pastures College Quantum Laboratory. Because I’m tired of naming everybody Jenkins, Professor Jennings is outside. “I- I- I don’t understand what has occurred. We have an infrared sensor that should… time traveler is lazy attempts to break into the facility, but there’s no signs of life!”

“Fascinating. Perhaps,” I suggest, “the being that attempted to enter your lab does not give off a conventional heat signature.”

“Now, Ms. Shepherd, you know we don’t believe in ghosts in this-”

“Robots, Professor. I’m talking about robots.”

“Oh. Hmm. I see. Now one would need to have a pretty well insulated robot, like my pal Poochy here.” Pulls out a small robot dog from their pocket.

“Oh my god, Professor, have you been carrying that with you all day?”

“Of course! All week! Haven’t you heard about the new wonderful robot dogs from Impressionist- Impressionist-” no, that’s bad. I looked around and saw an impressionist art print. “from, ah, Sakura Corp? They’re all the rage. It’s like out a personal assistant and a smartphone and a cute fun animal companion all in one!” Renfield starts growling. “Yes, for some reason real animals seem quite perturbed by by my new pal.”

SATAH: In the drive up to the telescope, I want to do a heart roll here to convince this person to trust me. Like, they were like “yeah, that’s a good idea” and they’re gonna give me a ride, and then they’re like “look, you’re gonna need to stay outside. You are technically a civilian,” whatever. And I’m going to try and convince them to to trust me to let me in [Laughs] to the telescope.

How do I get them to trust me? What is it I’m saying? I think that I- when I’m in hero mode, when I’m Orbit I pretend that my mothers are my colleagues [Laughs] and so I think one of the things I’m going to do here is say like “Alien mom thinks very highly of you. I know that you used to work together.” Or you know “yeah she worked with you-” I think she probably worked with this person’s parent? She’s older. I think she’s got alien life span. But yeah just trying to do- like make a connection with person to trust- to show that they can trust me.

I’m trying to think if there’s a way that I can invoke my signature ability here. I was gonna say like I that I could- I could do it to um- if- if this person was like “oh you know those two?” and I could say like “oh yeah they’re the ones who taught me how to control this” and show the power? Like make something orbit my hand. And they like- they say something like you know referencing all of the destruction in the city the day before. They’re like “yikes I’d hate to see those powers uncontrolled” and I like sort of like laugh and flush a tiny bit. And I’m like “I mean yeah me too.” So I feel like that’s a fair invocation of my signature ability with this roll. So I’m gonna roll three d6 and one of them has to be a five or six.

One. Six. Four. Okay yay! So. Progress. They trust me. They’re going to let me into the telescope. [Laughs]

JEFF: Our shadowy CEO, uh Crystal Cronenberg. Crystal is very aggressively meddling in the whole process. Crystal is being a CEO. There’s really no other way to describe it. Because this person is protective that means that heart is their uh- we have to roll heart or else it is resisted. I think if she’s like ordering people around I think that Kelvin’s immediate response is just to like get in there and try and like lift boxes and make this go as quickly as possible. So I’m gonna roll power; I don’t think it’s going to exactly go how we want it to go.

Sure enough that’s a one. So that is exactly not how we want it to go which means I’m going to mark a point of destruction. That is a second point of destruction and frankly like I think that what that looks like is like Kelvin drops a box, like a box of computer equipment, and like gets an earful. I’m not going to take an experience; I’m gonna take an extra die roll because I think like the play here- the thing that’s fun here is if she and her middle managers and her various like associates are like really like a grilling people, I think it’s fun to like deescalate a situation and like prevent a fight from breaking out. So I’m gonna roll heart. Fives or sixes. Two dice. That’s a pair of threes. Great. Good.

Um okay. So that escalates things even further; that’s going to be a point of misreading.

GWEN: “Professor, I know that the quantum physics part of the college and the ah computer engineering faculty don’t always get along but um have you maybe discussed the use of this new technology with any of your colleagues?”

“Why I hardly think that’s necessary. What do they know about-”

“Well they know about robots, like uh that they are probably recording us right now and probably could, ya know, transmit the uh passcode to your lab to uh somebody nefarious. Honestly it’s like it’s your first day in Golden Pastures. You’ve been here for ages! Don’t you have tenure? Come on buddy, you know we got all kinds of weird things going on here. And you trust a random brand new robot you just bought from the store? [Sighs]”

I did mention that heart is my dump stat, right? Yeah. Not- not good at talking to people.

SATAH: So we arrive at a telescope and yeah it is a situation. A lot of the scientists and workers are outside looking forlornly at it and they’re like “we can’t get in.” I think that the laser traps are in part just natural security systems. Like I’m- I’m picturing at some point in this I’m gonna have to do the like you know classic heist movie acrobatics through the lasers thing? [Laughs] Maybe that’s the first thing I have to do. Yeah. And this person who gave me a ride gives me a look like a tiny smile like “you said you wanted to get in, right?” And I’m like “I sure did.”

I’m gonna use skill-cause this is precision for sure-to try and get past these lasers at the entrance. I am using my signature ability. Lasers are resistant to skill [Laughs] so I’m gonna roll three d6 and I have to roll a six. One. Three. Six. [Deep and relieved] Yes. So I get an extra experience for succeeding on a resisted roll and I get a progress.

GWEN: “Ah but Poochy isn’t like those other technological devices, not- not really. He can do things that a smartphone could never dream of. It’s cutting- bleeding edge technology. It’s like- it’s ahead of it’s… time… oh no.”

They both look at each other in the sudden realization that there’s some been some wibbley wobbly timey wimey stuff- shenanigans. Oh no.

JEFF: People are being fired. I think that- that like a shoving match breaks out between like a Cronenberg foundation employee and one of the dockworkers which leads of course to a real crisis that unfolds which is they bring in a private like shipping team and that’s non union labor and that’s not gonna fly.

GWEN: “Well professor at least we have one thing on our side. Quantum stuff-time stuff-that is your wheelhouse. Much more than, no offense, operational security.”

“So you’re saying that I need to trace the quantum signature of Poochy?”

“Um, I mean that wasn’t what I was saying ‘cause I don’t know what a quantum signature is, but it sounds like it could help.” And the professor is gonna put their little robot chihuahua into some bizarre Jack Kirby looking machine.

“When I say go press this- no not the red one, this- this little blue- blue triangular button, all right?”

“Sure. Shouldn’t we have like-

“Oh yes, safety goggles. Never forget your safety goggles, children.”

“Yes indeed,” staring directly at the camera. And we put on our safety gear and we roll mind I guess? For using the science machine? No, I think we roll- we roll skill? I don’t know. We roll skill. We lose.

JEFF: So now there are like Pinkerton-esque men in black suits like- who are like shoving people off of the docks and kind of like escorting and like leading sort of a- like a third party fulfillment team to kind of like take over the work. And that’s not going to go great especially because I think that the second that one of these guys like touches a box or touches a piece of machinery, that machinery is gonna overheat and is going to start sparking and that’s gonna be a safety thing that’s going to get them taken off of the facility.

Which is the say that’s five dice. This is skill. This is opposed. I’m using my signature ability at level two. I need a six. That’s a three two one and two sixes. We are set. We are golden. There’s a progress. But I think that what has occurred here is like the second that fire goes off, the second that like something erupts like there’s a crisis and I’m going to escalate this a little bit and say like there is a bit of a fight that breaks out.

Like people start rushing to put out the fire and than you know strike-or security guards starts like blocking people and people start throwing hands and there is like a fight that is going to break out. And I think this is gonna be a chance for Kelvin to duck out, put on like a proper orange and you know uh black and blue costume. It’s got that very classic- that cinema- [Laughs] that- that 2015 cinema poster orange and blue combo with some black. Like it’s all piping around black leather alongside like a I think a- I think a face mask with a kind of like thermal technology similar to Rorschach’s mask in Watchmen, but like that lights up sort of red and blue depending on like that like a temperature thing that like as he kind of evokes this power it switches colors. That’s very cool. I like that evocative imagery. It’s very leather jacket focused. It’s very in the nineties superhero in a leather jacket with uh piping underneath ensemble and I think that’s very good.

GWEN: “Hmm. I’ve- I’ve never seen results quite like this before I- I- I don’t know quite how to interpret this.” [Gwen makes a bunch of electrical sounds with her mouth.]

“I think we can solve this one on our own, Mx. Shepherd. Thank you for your [Dubiously] assistance.”

Damn. We’ve damaged a trillion dollar lab technology and everyone in town has robot chihuahuas that I don’t trust. Not to mention something was stolen from the quantum lab last night. Damn damn damn damn. What shall we do?

Well I guess while I’m while on campus what if I take Poochy the robot chihuahua… Uh, no copyright infringement intended by the way if Poochy the robot dog from the nineties is like still around somehow. That’s just the name I give all robot dogs.

“Professor I know you really like your uh- No you know what never mind. Someone else will have one.” I am going to get a Poochy from somewhere and then I’m going to take it to the comp sci lab to see if they can figure out what’s really going on here. I think at this point the easiest way to go about getting one-rather than coercing one out of somebody considering how low my heart stat is-is to just go to the campus bookstore and buy one. Yeah, I know. Buy it on credit. By the time I have to pay for it hopefully the company won’t exist anymore. [Sighs.]

SATAH: So yeah I managed to using my gravity parkour skills get past the lasers at the entrance. And I’m inside and I think I’m gonna want to turn those off, but first as the bloodthirsty mercenary- Does the mercenary have goons or is it just a single mercenary? I think just the mercenary, particularly this ruthless person who’s been sent in to clear this place out and get some equipment in shape- in place. As I go over to turn these lasers- the security off she like grabs my hand and her eyes like flash and she’s like “Interesting. Didn’t think anybody’d be able to get by there.”

And I’m gonna try and just send her into the wall, basically? Like she’s touching me so I can kind of influence her with my powers a bit and just shove her away which is gonna be a power roll most certainly. Extra die from my ability so I’m rolling three d6 and need a five or six.

Three, six, and one. Kay, okay! I’m up to three progress!

JEFF: He’s costuming up; there is a fight breaking out and he’s going to use- I mean I think he’s just going to like cause a large enough explosion to try and like scatter this entire facility. So that’s a power roll. That’s a signature ability so two dice plus one dice for power and I’m trying to roll a six. That’s one two three.

Great. That’s more destruction. Uh the place is now actively on fire. I think that the docks there- that this is a a crisis that is unfolding. And I think the natural logical step is that Crystal Cronenberg is like in the fire and I think this is- I think I’m gonna roll five dice here and this is full power and we are going to try and like save her using skill plus power. We’re trying to get a six. That is- oh my god how is that five dice without a single six? Okay great. I can add a single d6 to this or I can take a point of discredit.

[Sighs] “On a roll that I don’t-” if I do this I’m gonna lose two points of discredit, but a single- like a one in six chance I think I’m just gonna take the one point of discredit. As he is rushing through the fire like oh he gets tackled by a security guard. Like he’s- he’s wrapped up in a fight now and now he’s like actively trying to like punch his way through the fight and punch his way through the fire.

GWEN: Go to the store, buy a dog, bring the dog to the computer lab. Now I get to come up with another wacky professor voice. [Very nasally] I think that the computer professor is going to have a very annoying nasal voice

“So professor I’m sorry you have similar concerns to me. I promise I have not yet turned this thing on so hopefully it is not recording or transmitting any data right now. But I was wondering if I could get you and your pals to open this thing up and see how it works and why? Cause they’re suddenly everywhere and I didn’t see any before last week and I find that very troubling.”

“Yes I’ve been hearing an awful lot about these things. You’re right, they did seem to arrive on the market suddenly with very little hype beforehand as if they had just materialized.”

“Yeah um I was talking to your colleagues at the quantum lab. I know- yeah they’re they’re annoyed with me too right now. But on it was sort of suggested that may be there might be some time travel stuff going on? Like maybe this company literally didn’t exist two weeks ago?”

“Ah, I see.”

“Yeah it’s probably dangerous? They’re already using it to do paradox crimes and I really don’t have the time or energy to patch holes in reality right now. So uh if you could help me find a way to make it so that this never was? You see, paradox. Ugh. Gives me a headache.”

“Yes, the uh grammar of time travel is- is fascinating but you’d have to talk to the language department about-”

“I’m not really interested in the linguistics right now, thank you professor.”

SATAH: So I shoved this mercenary into the wall. She hits it and she like grunts and then grins and she’s like “Huh. Didn’t know they muscle like you.” And I think I say like “it isn’t muscle” and pull a couple of random objects up to like rotate around my hands. And she rolls her eyes. The mercenary is resistant to skill, not impressed by that. And so like I’m not gonna be- you know more- more broadly that means cannot be- is is harder to win rolls against right with shows of skill? But I’m going to also take that to me that she’s kind of just like “ugh.” [Laughs]

So I have objects rotate my hands that she rolls her eyes and I’m like “excuse me?”

And she’s like- what- what is- what is her beef here? It’s um… “Ugh, yeah I should’ve known. Of course it’s not muscle. It’s just tricks. It’s exactly why I wanted to take this job. I mean the money’s good, don’t get me wrong, but also I’m just sick of it. People like you- you never work for anything. You just have your little tricks and your spectacle and your gadgets and that shit just flows out of towns like these. And so yeah I don’t really care about the bigger picture of what I’m here for-”

And I try to interrupt. I’m like “yeah what is what bigger picture?”

And she just ignores that and she’s like “Honestly I just wanted to see this place burned to the ground. Even the playing field for the rest of us.”

And I think she’s going to try like attack me, right? And so I’m gonna roll power to just try and defend myself? I am using my signature ability in that like she tries to take me by surprise and knock me over and I’m trying to just lock myself down to the ground so that she can’t like get that advantage. This is resisted because I just- I have the streak mark on power because I- I just succeeded on a roll with it, but. Yeah so I’m going to roll three d6 and I need to get a six.

One three two. Nope. I’m gonna mark experience, and- and destruction. And I think it’s just that- like my center of gravity is all disrupted, right? Cause she’s- it’s in the middle- I’m doing this as a reaction to her trying to knock me over and I’m a little bit too slow. And so I accidentally like kind of help her and we just a crash really hard into the ground and knock a bunch of shit over. And she like laughs.

GWEN: “You want me to dissect your ah little robot dog, yeah?” I guess if gadgets is a skill roll than this is a skill roll. I don’t think my talking to dogs powers as gonna help with ah not a real dog. Dice are not on my side today. I’m gonna go super and roll an extra die.

Actually it seems that this part of the hardware is are based on how an actual dog communicates. I can- I- I- I- I’ve seen this neurological wiring before in my a veterinary studies.

“That’s very interesting. Let’s see if that helps us understand this a little better.”

I rolled a two. [Sighs] This game is stressful! Okay.

JEFF: Ah things are going really really badly for this character in general to the point where like I’m losing my mind a little bit? Um, so I can’t- I mean skill already resisted but like I’m gonna try and use- I’ve got one ability at heart, but I do get an extra dice here because I failed that roll. So I’m gonna try heart and see what happens.

Uh that’s a five. That’s a success. I’m able to like- I think what I’m trying to do is like rally the like the security guard and like talk with them to like be like hey we need to get people out of here. This is a disaster area. So that’s an extra point of progress. That was an unopposed roll so no experience. I’ll tally my experience of the end the round. But I think that like in this moment and again rolling five dice here to try and like strategically put out the fire so that we can get people out of the danger zone safely.

God thank goodness that was a six. Uh, it’s four not-sixes and a six; that’s at least what I needed. Ah that’s a third point of progress to like control the fire with my abilities and- no I’m gonna keep rolling for at least one more progress because I think there is a heart thing at play here which is like playing of the part of the menace hero. Like this- this guy using his powers and being like “look, people aren’t gonna like me but you know what? They haven’t liked me so far and I’ll work with it.”

So I’m gonna roll three dice; I just need five. That’s a five, great; that’s a two three five. Okay we’re doing good.

SATAH: And I think that a thing I’m going to do here is that like- so she is like- she’s got me down to the ground. She’s pulling her fist back to just beat the shit out of me and I look up at her and I’m like “Do you not think you’re special?”

And she hesitates like confused and angry and is like “What?”

And I’m like “I dunno, all that stuff you were saying about like people with powers or- or abilities or gadgets and stuff like being all special and above it all or whatever, like- you don’t think you’re special?” And I’m gonna roll heart here. [Laughs] And if I succeed she’s not going to punch me. If I don’t succeed she’s definitely gonna punch me very hard. [Laughs] I don’t think I’m using my ability. This is just straight two d6, need a five or a six. Yes. Got a six and then a one. Doesn’t matter. Go to four progress.

It gets to her. She wavers and sputters and she’s like “do I think I’m sp- uh [laughs] that is- of course- well I’m not but I do- but isn’t- that isn’t the point.”

And I’m like “What do you mean it isn’t the point? Of course it is. Of course you’re special. You were hired for this, right? Like this is- this is- this is a big important job. You must be good at what you do.”

And she you know just “[Scoffs] yeah sure I can beat up a bunch of dorks in lab coats. What does it really matter.”

And I shrug, still on the floor, I’m like “I mean to be honest it sounds like you’re not using it for anything particularly good so maybe doesn’t mean a lot, but that’s something you have the power to change.

JEFF: Ah and I’m trying to like scare people away so that I’ve got some time to investigate. Theoretically I’m rolling four dice here to solve Crystal’s problem of like helping her launch this project and like helping her like ship this machinery for whatever shady things she’s working on. So I think what I’m gonna do is roll skill. I’m gonna call this skill to see if I can like make that look like it was successful while also getting what I want. And that is a six; that is exactly what I wanted.

Which is great. That is a one three four six, which means that that is a success. That is a second point of effectiveness and that was a contested roll, so that’s a point of experience. Okay. Great.

GWEN: Computer scientist didn’t help me. Quantum scientist didn’t help me. But we have- no- we’ve discovered a connection between the robot dog and the real dog. Maybe I need- [Gasps] maybe I need to go to my own personal mentor in the veterinary science- veterinary medicine?-veterinary medicine department. Maybe the knowledge of real dogs actually can help us.

Well, at least this time I’m on first name terms with the professor. “Hey, uh, Dr. Jen? Yeah oh this is Merle. I have a weird question. I’ve been- I’ve been talking with our mutual friend the Blue Shepherd- Yeah okay mutual acquaintance, yeah. And they suggest that uh- that your help might be needed? Yeah there’s um time traveling dog robots? I know it it doesn’t sound like- like our usual wheelhouse, but ah… Yeah I know, I know but it seems like their neurology is- is based on actual dogs and you know I’m just a as a general vet tech student. I am not an expert dog brain surgeon like you are, so I thought maybe you could take a look at this? This afternoon? Ah, that’d be fantastic, thanks. Click.

SATAH: I could try to roll to defeat her right now, but I would probably be rolling heart and it would be resisted. And I don’t want to put myself in that situation. So I’m gonna just- I’m gonna- I’m gonna extend the scene a little bit longer before I do that. Cause I can. So she’s sitting on top of me and still has her fist raised and she’s like thinking- and she’s very like disarmed by what I’ve said. But she like shakes her head and comes back to it and goes to punch me anyway and I’m just gonna sho- I’m going to trying to shove her off with a- a power roll also using my ability, so. Three d6, need a five or a six. Got a three and a five and a six. So I’m good. Move my streak; add progress. Yeah she goes to punch me anyway and I just shove her off. She goes flying across the room again but I think catches herself on her feet this time and she has like a slight grin and she’s like “All right, you don’t have muscle, but you’ve got a little bit of a bite to you, huh?” and I’m just- I’m going to try and- I’m gonna try and defeat her right now. I’m gonna- I’m gonna do a heart roll. [Laughs]

Or rather I’m going to do a roll for like- my- I’ve got five in progress; I’m gonna roll five d6 and using heart I’m trying to continue our conversation and be like “Burning this place to the ground won’t do anything to make a people here any less special. It won’t make me any less special, won’t make you any more special, but it doesn’t have to. You already have the ability to do anything you want. Just got to choose to do better stuff.” [Laughs] And I’m going to roll to try and convince her to just give up on this job basically. So rolling five d6 and I need a five or six. I rolled six right away! And a five and another five and a four and a three. Hell yeah. So I get an achievement in heart. Move my streak there. And she just- like she’s been carrying this tension and she’s just staring hard into my eyes and she just relaxes a little. And she’s going to be like “[Sighs] honestly I am sick of dickheads with the most money in the world ordering me around anyway, so yeah. Fuck it. We should take care of the doom device, though.”

And I’m like “The what?”

JEFF: So listening back and running the numbers I think I’ve got three experience out of that, which is not as much as eight experience like I got yesterday but like that’s a start. Uh but like there is an explosion and in the aftermath of the giant explosion at the docks, the Cronenberg foundation is just like “Well thankfully everyone got out safe.”

GWEN: While I prepare for my meeting later this afternoon, I can have another trouble strike and roll to help a neighbor and maybe- maybe that will give me some inspiration on how else to do this.

JEFF: We’re going to roll three d20 to find out the crime that we’re going to be fighting against. An eighteen-a demon tyrant-five-is poisoning the water reservoir-and a four-and an army of alien juggernauts. Here’s the thing, if I swap that it turns into building a doom device with an army of ghosts and that’s pretty great. That’s pretty exciting. Demon tyrant’s great. I want to keep demon tyrant because what is really compelling about that is the idea that like a demon tyrant is specifically like- whatever extra dimensional thing like emerged to try and like pluck someone that had been like activated with these powers and kind of like lit up like a beacon by whatever gauntlet they were wearing>

GWEN: We’ve got a protective entrepreneur- well, they’re not protective. [Rerolls] A protective- a protective artist rebuilding their business. Is this- is this just Emerald again? No Ms. Emerald definitely rebuilt her business. Always- maybe it’s a friend of Ms. Emerald.

JEFF: There’s like an active party and this is Nevlerefu? Nevlerefu is the- is the demon lord of this like energy dimension that is like warping the laws of reality and has like found a way to emerge. So elsewhere in the city there is like a Cronenberg Foundation laboratory. Very- very upside-down, very Stranger things, like ah researching whatever this- this- this demon dimension is when suddenly things just start going a haunted house. You know like people getting- are getting thrown into walls? And like whatever contact is made with this other dimension is like lashing out in a very real, very tangible way. And this sort of like demon prince is on the other side like using ghostly minions to try and like punch through and gain control to really like open up a through line into this particular place.

GWEN: Ring, ring, ring, ring, ring. My phone? My phone? “Hello? Uh hi uh this is Meghan Diamond? I’m- I’m- I’m a friend of Beryl Emerald’s? I um- I heard you were able to really help her get her ah finances back on track? Um, well you know that um explosion three weeks ago that you and Vampire stopped? Well uh the the squib that did go off badly damaged some of my art pieces, and now I ah…”

“Say no more.” Click.

Go over to Ms. Diamond’s art studio!

“I know that with- with- with Ms. Emerald you helped her rebuild her business, but here I need- I need you to uh literally rebuild my business.

“Um, no offense, ma’am, but have you considered maybe a carpenter or construction firm and not your local detective?”

“Oh you know the construction industry in this town is all mobbed up. I couldn’t trust them. I just need like a big strong hand- helping hand or paw as it may be.”

SATAH: She show- [Laughs] she brings me into like the heart of the telescope and she shows that she had been setting up this like laser thing that was gonna be amplified through the telescope to explode the town but also probably a bunch of the world or take out all the satellites or something.

And this is this is slightly canon confusion. She’s like “Honestly I didn’t ask.”

And I’m like “You didn’t ask?”

And she’s like “No, I know- I know. I get it; I’m changing my ways.”

And I’m like “Ugh, come on. You have a lot longer to go than I thought.”

And she like shrugs amiably. And I ask her like how do I dismantle it and she doesn’t know. And I’m gonna try and just destroy it. It’s a- it’s a- it’s a metal cube that has been slotted into the telescope. I’m going to take it out and I’m going to try and crush it with my gravity powers.

That’s a power roll. With my ability it’s a three d6. I got a four; I got a three; I got a six. There we go. That goes to six progress.

JEFF: I- so I’ve got to stop- I realize I played the game slightly wrong last time. I kind of blurred together the the method and leader. But I have to stop the method and then the leader. So I think I become aware of this because I’m tracking Cronenberg Foundation like people and like the technology and this gauntlet that was like pulling power from this other dimension. I am like tracking this back to their facility and I kind of arrive with the facility already in ruin. Like the- the staff here are already dead and like I’m gonna roll mind here to like surmise what has happened here. The thing that is oppositional here, that they’re resistant to here is power, so mind is unopposed. Get a five or six- that’s a five and one. That’s what I need. That’s a five; that’s a success. Ah it’s very funny for this person to arrive here, look around and is mutter like “oh this is some haunted house shit. Okay. Got it got it got it. Okay that’s not good.”

GWEN: So my personal power stat is low, but they did suggest that a helping paw might suffice. So let’s- let’s try and call a large sturdy dog that could help with the heavy lifting. Perhaps a Saint Bernard of some kind. Or a Great Dane. Come on dice please. Yay! The dice like me finally!

“Ruff. Ruff ruff. Ruff.”

“Thank you, Mr. Cuddles. I’m so delighted you were able to help us on such- such short notice.

“Ruff.” Mr. Cuddles the Saint Bernard kind of noses the planks in the right direction. We- we hitch a harness up to him and he can carry a dolly and carry around the heavy things that Ms, Diamond and I collectively could not. And so with the assistance of our big strong doggo friend, we are able to fix the shop front- no not shop front; it’s a art studio. We’re able to fix the front of the building just in time for me to make my meeting with Dr. Jen at the veterinary medicine department. Yay.

JEFF: I think like using skill and power- so five dice- we are going to try and… Like I think that like when we arrive here the ghosts like are operating the machines to try and get like the- the gateway up and running? And I’m going to try and shut down some of those machines by freezing some- I’ve tried fire a couple times that hasn’t gone great. I’m gonna go the opposite route and try freezing some of these things to like shut down the machine. And that’s a five. There’s a five and six in that pool so that actually goes way better and I’m able to like freeze and shut down the machinery without causing a massive fire. That’s a win! I think that’s a big win. That’s a point of progress. We’re making it; we’re close. We’ve got two progress; I’m gonna try and get like two more.

GWEN: So I guess calling in a friend who happens to be a dog neurosurgeon? Hmm. I’m relying on their skill but my heart I think, which sucks because heart is, as- as we’ve established, not a good start for me, but. Wish me luck everybody. This is my third attempt. [Laughs] That’s a three.

“Yeah uh it’s- it’s just a little too different from a modern dog, um… I can’t- I can’t make heads or tails of this. You’ve said you already spoke to the compsci team?”

“Yeah they- they weren’t able to help me either.”

“Hmm, I dunno I think you might need to try something outside of the ivory tower?”

“Yeah you’re right it seems like- no offense- going to the experts hasn’t really helped at all.” [Sighs] Regroup, rethink, find a new and creative solution to this problem.

JEFF: I do think that now like ghostly hands and spirit forms like lash out and strike directly which means that I’ve kind of gotta roll power here so I’m in a roll three d6. I wanna six. That’s three fives. That’s absurd. I’m gonna roll an additional two dice to go super here.

And I’m glad I did because that’s a one and a six. So I’ve used my super point and like I use my powers to their full capacity to like take control of this. I think now’s the time to bring out the fireworks. Like I think I am like warding off ghosts as- as though I were a monster hunter with a torch like just lighting things on fire and throwing fireballs and blocking things and like rushing for the gate. I’m trying to decide if I want to roll progress now. I think I’m gonna do one more, because I think I want you find a way to jam it? I think I’m gonna be- I’ve- my power’s available and power’s not a- not an opposed skill so I’m gonna roll my five dice here and see if I can’t like permanently shut down this gate so that the demon prince can’t get through. That’s three fives on that roll, so that is a huge success and I’m able to like shut off the thing, blocking the di- the sort of ghost dimension.

SATAH: I’m gonna disable the laser traps with a heart roll by turning to her like-like it’s the doomsday device it’s also lasers all over you know, there’s- there’s- there’s a lot of stuff going on here. And I’m going to turn to this mercenary and- and give her a hard look and say like “You need to go around and disable all of the traps and dangerous shit that you’ve put in this telescope.”

And she’s like “What? No I want to leave and start my new life and whatever.

And I’m like “That- that’s not how this works! Prove to me the you’re gonna be cool.”

And she’s like “Fine”- maybe she’s like “fine.” We’ll see. I’m gonna roll related to the heart attribute and I’m rolling six d6 because I have six progress points. Pretty good. Five right away. It’s really good. Five three three five again two two. Great.

So she is like “Yeah I’m going to be a good person” and [Laughs] I’m marking a point of inspiration, an achievement in heart, and she’s gonna go around and disable all the traps. We’re good to go.

JEFF: So Nevlerefu the demon prince of the power dimension is not able to like physically break through. I’ve got four progress; I’m gonna roll this and see if we get our what we need. That is two sixes, ah we’re going to call this- this is mind. And also because I fudged things earlier I’ve got a third point in mind, I think makes sense? So I’m at three control which is very very good. Matches the three destruction that I have. Hoo boy has it not been great.

GWEN: All right so here’s my thought. I learned from the last time that over-preparedness doesn’t actually seem to help me at all in this game, even though mind is supposedly the one I’m good at. So I’m going to just try and fuck up Mister Time Machine himself. I think what if we get this guy’s time vehicle and we throw it into the rift in the space time continuum that’s been opened by these constant robot dog shaped paradoxes. Maybe throw the the robot dog in too for good measure. This is gonna have to be either a power and then a skill or two power rolls. First to overpower- did I ever give the warlord a name by the way? Part of me really wants to say Genghis Spawn. Yeah let’s just go with it. All right so I’m going to gonna go and me and my buddy vampires- so one extra die- are gonna go physically fight this time-traveling, robot-making guy. I figure even though he is technically a warlord, he’s a warlord that relies on technology so we’re probably not that only evenly matched in a physical fight? Although he has robot dogs and I just have a regular dog. But that’s okay. My dog’s bigger. Would you rather fight six chihuahua-size robot or one robot-size chihuahua, I am I right? Alright. Let’s roll.

Yay! A successful dice roll! That’s been so rare in this game! I gain a progress point for that and since he resists power rolls I also gain an experience for that. Hell yeah, I like this.

JEFF: Like I think the the machines are shut off but I still have to deal with Nevlerefu and I think that the way that’s going to happen is like a confrontation over like the computer communicators. Like the gate is closed but like I need to communicate with Nevlerefu in a way that is going to like stop him from enacting his plan or like forcing his way through a different game. Cool. That’s rad.

SATAH: And I’m going to see what the neighbor that needs help is and figure out how how that comes up here. The local over-worker superhero fan. Age? Being to whom time is meaningless? Okay their trouble is finding a missing person which I get an extra roll- an extra die for all rolls in! Nice.

JEFF: I think about to start with a heart roll. Heart’s not resisted. I’m gonna use my power here I think it does work because I’ve already shown what it can do and I’m kind of using the knowledge of that power that kind of like come through on the other side.

That’s a six, a three, and a one. So like we get this grumbling on the other side and he gonna like flips the communicator and goes “So? You’ve met me. You know what I can do. If you want to come through and get your ass beat? Flip the switch back on and come on through!” A little bit cocky now that he’s in control of the situation but I like this guy.

SATAH: We’re at the telescope. It’s a being to whom time is meaningless. I think that- that is- this is a- a- a- an alien who works here who is functionally immortal or his life span is so long that time is meaningless to them relative to people. Maybe they’re- if they got sort of a jellyfish thing going on or they’re constantly shifting their body, it’s the same person technically but you know they’ve- they’ve shape- they’ve completely melted their body thirty times. Something like that. Alien. They’re an over-worker and they are a superhero fan. I think that they are a fan of my mothers. They do like- they- they think I’m cool too, but they ended up here working on Earth because they were like following alien mom after she got here. Um. Big fan of her work and ended up here as well and then just really dedicated themself to the cause. And so I go out at the telescope with the mercenary and I’m like “She disabled all the traps, right?”

And she’s like “Yeah.” And everybody rushes back in to make sure that everything’s okay. And who’s missing? I think they’re like “oh hey! Orbit! Have you been able to get in contact with-” I really should name the mothers. But like “Have you been able to get in contact with alien mom?” This person doesn’t know that they’re- that she’s my mother but thinks that we’re colleagues, and is like “Have you been able to get in touch with your colleagues? I sent a few messages today and haven’t heard back?”

I have like a couple pricks of fear and I’m like “Really? I haven’t tried.”

And they’re like “Okay, I mean just normally they respond to pretty quick.” And they like shrug. “Probably just busy; they’re doing space stuff.”

And I’m like “Right but I’m gonna- I’m going to try and get in contact with them.”

Oh I think yeah they’re like “Maybe the messages aren’t sending. Can you go up and adjust the satellite manually?

GWEN: We’re- we overpower him and we grab the remote for his time machine. “Got you now Genghis Spawn,” and I’m going to take the remote for the time machine and attach it to the robot dog and I’m going to pitch that into the rift in space time.

Swear to god if I lose this roll I’m gonna be so mad. [Laughs] Double threes? Does that count as a six? Please, please, please? No? Aww.

Alright let’s go super and see if that helps. “Hey, buddy, fetch!” Nope that’s a four. It does not land in the space time. And that under does all my so called progress. Aaaahhhh.

SATAH: Alright full disclosure I just recorded a bunch of stuff here at that I am going to delete because I failed our progress roll and it just felt really bad to um erase all of that progress and start again. And so I did this whole complicated thing where I tried to apply this this six die that I’d rolled to other rolls in- like retroactively to be like okay I still failed but I didn’t fail at the progress roll- I failed at three other rolls. And I’d figured that- all of that out and then realized that I hadn’t been applying the extra die they should have been for permanently solving the missing person problem. And it was just frustrating and strange and so… Superheroes- superhero genre conventions support me I think in just retconning that. [Laughs] But I did want to mention it because usually on the show it’s important to me to have the full sort of experience of figuring that stuff out represented? But I think that it wasn’t fun to listen to. I think it was just me being frustrated and confused and really struggling to figure out how to make something work in a way that I don’t think is like good or interesting radio or a good representation of this game. Because again I am playing and in a very specific situation where I have a additional expectations on myself. So I’m cutting that whole section out and I’m doing again. I’m starting from the beginning of the problem.

GWEN: So. Physically fighting him didn’t work. Research didn’t work. What other things can occur in a superhero story. Oh I have a- I have a crazy idea but it just might work: What if we do a team-up? What if I call in a backup from the next town over? I’m going to roll a new character to come meet me and I will roll the personality and the superpowers tables. And that will be my rival from the next town over. We have a creative person with a mutation that gives them enhancements. Yeah I like that. Creative and enhancements, how can I make those work together? Oh quick reaction’s that maybe they’re a- maybe there a dancer in their day job> If I’m Blue Shepherd and they are a dancer so they’re probably Black Swan, yeah? That- that’s kind of obvious. Alright I’m going to call up Black Swan on my definitely not the justice league telephone.

“Yeah Swan, it’s Shepherd. Yeah I know; I really hate to be doing this; I know. Yes, I know I told you I wouldn’t call you on Saturdays. It’s a pretty big emergency we’re having here in Golden Pastures. Yeah I know, I know.

She’s like “What could possibly be worthy of my attention in Golden Pastures?” She’s the big city hero from the town of New Kingsford which is all of a large metropolis that we are like I dunno an hour? two hours outside but faster if you’re you know a superhero. Black Swan probably can’t fly but she probably has like a swanmobile jet type thing and can get here quickly.

“Well you see, ah I know you like time and space? That’s like where you keep your stuff? So if you could come help us that would be really appreciated. I can- I can throw in some free special spangly collars from Ms Emerald’s boutique if that’ll help sweeten the deal.”

“As if I would need to be bribed to help people. I’m a real superhero, Shepherd. I’ll be there in twenty minutes.”

“Thank you god I can’t stand that girl.” Anyway she’s coming. She’s gonna help us. I probably should have rolled for that, huh? [Rolls and laughs] No. Well I’m gonna for the sake of the narrative say that Swan does come but is mad at me.

JEFF: I think Nevlerfu is like- kind of like grumbling through and is like “I will find you. I will find everyone you love and I will flay the skin from your flesh. You will live in eternity of torment. Your dimension and your home and your world is mine for the taking.”

Is this another heart roll opposed? No, I’m gonna call this mind and here’s why. I don’t think that this is like doing or saying the right thing to motivate them or destabilize them. I think that this is like playing to a plan? This is unopposed so this is five or sixes. I’ve got two dice, so let’s see how we do. That’s a five and a three! Great!

I think- I think what I’m trying to do here is like I’m like playing chess to try and get him to like admit what he’s after and like admit like a picture of a larger plan and I think that he does let slip something of like “My influence has already bled into your world and with the right technology, with the right tool at my disposal, and with the right collaborators on the other side we shall turn these beings infected with my power into beacons lighting the sky and opening the way for my arrival. Just you wait.

GWEN: Ms. Swan doesn’t really like dogs which is sort of my whole thing. Obviously she’s a bird person. Oh maybe I will go to Ms. Diamond the sculptor and be like “Can you make some kind of swan-based art piece? Could I commission that?” I have no idea what to roll for this so I’m just gonna roll two die two dice because that the midpoint. “Hey uh, Ms. Diamond would I be able to commission a wrought iron sculpture of a swan in flight?” Yeah I rolled a six!

JEFF: It’s not the strategic thing to do in part because it is resisted and also not his strong suit, but I think like it has worked exactly the way that he wanted to do but I do think that we’re going to go for a big large explosion and see what happens. That is three dice; we wanna six and we got a six. That is three dice. That is a fourth point of experience for a resisted roll. Great. Good. I think that he just kinda like rears back and says like “Yeah? Light this up.” Throws a giant fireball, explodes the computer, damages the technology and we’ll see if he’s able to sever the connection. I’ve got three dice.

GWEN: Let’s roll heart to see if she likes this gift huh? “Hey sorry for interrupting your important Saturday yoga retreat or whatever. I recently helped a local artist and I asked her if she could make something beautiful for you because you’re really pretty and-” Oh god did I say that out loud? Oh god.

Yes I’m setting myself up for disaster. I don’t care. I’m having fun now.

Holy shit I rolled a five. “You- you really think I’m pretty? Aw, Shepherd that’s sweet. A black swan statue? Oh that’s so lovely. Sorry- sorry I was rude earlier. I’ll definitely help you with your time travel problem.” Yes.

So she’s gonna roll her skill. I’m gonna assume that hers is at least a three. Okay come on Ms. Swan. Please please please dance your way through the time portal and get rid of this stupid robot chihuahua. One of those is a five; that’s a success.

“Thank you Ms. Swan, oh my goodness thank you so much. I swear I will come- I will drop everything to help you the next time something comes up in the city. Yeah just keep in touch okay? Yeah I’ll- I’ll- I’ll see you at at next Thursday’s definitely not the justice league meeting? Ah and maybe we could get dinner after?”

SATAH: There’s this alien who is a fan of my mothers. They don’t know that they’re my mothers; they think that they’re just my colleagues. The alien has try- been trying to get in touch with them and can’t and is like “You know what? Maybe the messages aren’t sending. Can you just go up and manually adjust the satellite to make sure that it’s like pointed directly at them?” And there’s like a- there’s like a satellite dish here that is like that that should be pointing directly at them but I’m just gonna go up and like manually adjust it to make sure that it has a good trajectory. Or maybe it should be the receiving satellite? Yeah I think that makes sense. Let’s- I’m going to go over to this satellite dish and manually adjust it so that um we know that were more likely to actually receive messages back because maybe that’s the problem?

And I get an extra die for solving this problem because I’ve solved missing person problems before and so I’m going to I am going to try and just do the progress roll here. And I’m gonna roll seven d6. I have six progress, get the extra die, I need a five or six. This alien as someone who’s an over-worker is impressed by skill and so anything except skill would be resisted here. Luckily this makes sense. This is like precision movements of a satellite and fuck it, I’m throwing my signature ability and to that’s what I’m using to make adjusting the satellite easier. Eight d6- I just need any of them to be a five or six.

GWEN: “Vampire did you sure that we- well I have a date with Black Swan after the meeting next Thursday? Wow I can’t even process this right now.”

We’ve- we’ve- we’ve helped a neighbor. We’ve um thrown a robot dog in a time hole. Uh, did that actually do anything? I’m gonna call my friend back at the college. “Uh hey professor did you get your whole robot dog break-in situation sorted out?”

“Are you doing all right, Shepherd? I haven’t seen you in three weeks. I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Oh thank god.”

SATAH: Four. Six. Good. Five also good one six again five two six. Okay that time it made fun of me and it was like fine yes you’ll succeed a lot.

JEFF: That’s a success! Okay good good good good okay good good good good okay great. Hoo. And because I rolled with power that is a point of security.

GWEN: I don’t think I ever actually figured out in character that a) the dogs were all one dog created through time travel and b) the time travel was facilitated through the theft, but that’s okay the readers slash viewers know all that. The characters just never actually figured it out. Maybe this will come back to haunt us at some point, maybe it won’t. We’ve erased this whole plot line from the universe.

SATAH: Yeah I- I think that’s it! I adjust the satellite and messages come flooding in. And they’re like “Oh okay I just wasn’t getting getting their messages. That was really cool; you’re getting really good at using your powers.” And I’m like “Thanks.”

JEFF: Okay great. End of day two.

SATAH: Again go and finished my shift I guess? Pick up some oat milk on the way back to a cafe so that I wasn’t technically lying.

JEFF: At the end of our day we are going to create a scene to wrap up the day. I think again Kelvin meets up with the other guys from the docks at a bar. Like he meets up at- he’s late and people are like “hey where the fuck have you been?”

And he’s like “Eh, you know it is. I had stuff to do.” But like he gets the have this moment with the people that he works with. It’s like a nice calm moment but like he’s very clearly like looking over his shoulder being like “Who else has these powers? I know there are people out there and I need to find them before the Cronenberg Foundation does.”

SATAH: Now I can spend experience points. I have eleven. I can earn an achievement, increase an attribute by one point, acquire a new signature ability. I think I want another attribute point. Do I want to bring mind up to two or put one of my other ones up to three? I think I want to put one of my other ones up to three. Either skill or power. Hmm. Oh, this is tough. I’m gonna roll for it. Evens power odds skill. Odds. Skill. Great. Yep. Gonna go up to three points in skill and uh yeah. I’m just- I’m- I’m doing a bunch of training, learning how to be more precise with my- because they you know I keep have to throw stuff [Laughs] it turns out, so.

GWEN: Now we’re going to finish our day by solving a problem. I think that in this case the one to solve is probably the rips in space time. The paradox is gone. Nobody remembers that it happened. We’re all moving on. Yay.

JEFF: I mean I’m gonna just solve another crime goal and think that like I know this demon. Like I know this demon’s deal and like I’m ready to- I’m ready to have this fight.

SATAH: I believe that my neighbor trouble has already been permanently solved- It was trying to find a missing person, right? I think. [Laughs] I’m recording this a little while later. So I will solve the crime goal which was build a doom device. In the future if anybody else tries to build a doom device I will get some extra die to defeating it.

GWEN: And I would like to uh up my stats a little, so I’m going to hold on to these four experience points this time, I am still not sure if I’m marking experience properly, but I’m at four and I’m going to leave it there for now.

JEFF: This has gone in a direction that I’m like very excited about and we’re going to see how this goes.

GWEN: Wow. Wow I love games.

SATAH: Yeah! Night night.

OUTRO

SATAH: This has been Folio, an actual play podcast about solo and otherwise self-paced TTRPGs. To find where you can find the show, check out foliopod.carrd.co.

You can find Gwen @gwenfrankenstein on Bluesky.

You can find Jeff at partyofonepodcast.com and jeffstormer.com.

You can find Satah– that’s me– at gaygothvibes.online and follow me on Bluesky at posatahchips.gaygothvibes.online.

Next week, Gwen and Jeff and I will continue our games of Friendly Neighborhood Superhero by Catscratcher Studio, found at catscratcher.itch.io. Everything I mentioned here is linked in the show notes. Thanks so much for listening, and take care out there!